Funny Lean Jokes Funny Clean Jokes
Who said that make clean jokes tin't be funny? We can testify you wrong because we have made a compilation of clean and nevertheless funny jokes. Nonetheless, these jokes are healthy and skilful for both the immature and old and even the kids. Some of these jokes tin can teach you good things as well as make you lot laugh. These are funny and clean jokes that you can say at any fourth dimension at any time and anywhere without the fear of abusing or insulting someone unknowingly. Relish our list of funny make clean jokes, we promise you lot'll find them interesting.
Clean Funny Jokes
1. Q: Did you hear near the painter who was hospitalized?
A: Reports say it was due to too many strokes.
2. Q: Why did the robber take a bath?
A: Considering he wanted to make a clean getaway.
3. Q: What happens if life gives y'all melons?
A: You lot're dyslexic
4. Q: What did the coating say to the bed?
A: Don't worry, I've got you covered!
five. Q: Why should you have a pencil to bed?
A: To draw the curtains!
6. Q: What practise you phone call a frozen dog?
A: A pupsicle.
seven. Q. What did the tie say to the hat?
A. You go on ahead and I'll hang around
8. Q: What washes up on very small beaches?
A: Microwaves!
9. Q: What goes through towns, up & over hills, simply doesn't motility?
A: The road!
x. Q: Why did the cantankerous-eyed instructor lose her task?
A: Considering she couldn't control her pupils
eleven. Q: What do you telephone call someone who is afraid of Santa?
A: A Clausterphobic
12. Q: What three candies can you find in every school?
A: Nerds, DumDums, and Smarties.
13. Q: What stays in the corner and travels all over the world?
A: A stamp.
fourteen. Q: What do you call a human being with no body and simply a nose?
A: Nobody nose.
15. Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus!
16. Q: What do you call a computer that sings?
A: A-Dell
17. Q: Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica?
A: Information technology's dread-full.
18. Q: How do you lot make a tissue dance?
A: Put a little boogey in it!
19. Q: Did you lot hear about the angry pancake?
A: He just flipped.
twenty. Q: What do prisoners utilize to call each other?
A: Prison cell phones.
21. Q: What do you call a cow with a twitch?
A: Beef Jerky.
22. Q: Why did the traffic light plow cherry-red?
A: Yous would also if you had to change in the eye of the street!
23. Q: What did one elevator say to the other elevator?
A: I think I'grand coming down with something!
24. Q: What do you call a window that raps?
A: 2PANEZ
25. Q: "How do you shoot a killer bee?"
A: "With a bee-bee gun."
26. Q: How do you drown a Hipster?
A: In the mainstream.
27. Q: What kind of jokes do y'all make in the shower?
A: Clean Jokes!
28. Q: What does a nosey pepper do?
A: Gets jalapeno business concern!
29. Q: What do you call a fake noodle?
A: An Impasta
thirty. Q: What exercise you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An Investigator
Clean Good Jokes
31. Q: Why did Johnny throw the clock out of the window?
A: Because he wanted to see fourth dimension fly!
32. Q: When do you terminate at green and go at scarlet?
A: When you're eating a watermelon!
33. Q: What did the tailor think of her new job?
A: Information technology was stitch-sew.
34. Q: What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer?
A: The Spacebar!
35. Q: What exam exercise young witches have to pass?
A: A spell-ing test!
36. Q: What do you lot call a sheep with no head and no legs?
A: A deject!
37. Q: Which weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of bricks?
A: Neither, they both weigh a ton!
38. Q: Did y'all hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?
A: She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.
39. Q: What has ane horn and gives milk
A: A milk truck.
40. Q: What concert costs 45 cents?
A: fifty Cent featuring Nickleback.
41. Q: Can February March?
A: No. But April May.
42. Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: To become a root culvert.
43. Q: Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
A: Because y'all dribble on the flooring!
44. Q: How practice yous communicate with a fish?
A: Drop him a line!
45. Q: Where practice sheep go to become haircuts?
A: To the Baa Baa shop!
46. Q: What kind of shoes do all spies wear?
A: Sneakers.
47. Q: Why did the soccer thespian bring string to the game?
A: So he could tie the score.
48. Q: Why is a baseball team similar to a muffin?
A: They both depend on the batter.
49. Q: How practise you repair a broken tomato?
A: Love apple Paste!
l. Q: Why did the baby strawberry cry?
A: Considering his parents were in a jam!
51. Q: What did the hamburger name his daughter?
A: Patty!
52. Q: Who tin can shave 10 times a mean solar day and withal have a bristles?
A: A barber.
53. Q: What do you call a horse that can't lose a race?
A: Sherbet
54. Q: What exercise you call a dentist in the army?
A: A drill sergeant
55. Q: What do yous get when you lot plant kisses?
A: Tu-lips (two-lips)
56. Q: What did the daddy chimney say to the baby chimney?
A: You are to petty to smoke!
57. Q: What do you phone call a ghosts mom and dad?
A: Transparents
58. Q: What did Winnie The Pooh say to his agent?
A: Bear witness me the honey!
59. Q: What did the man say to the wall?
A: I more scissure similar that and I'll plaster ya!
60. Q: What exercise you become when you cross a refrigerator with a radio?
A: Cool Music.
Brusque Make clean Jokes
61. Q: What practise you get when you lot cross Sonic The Hedgehog and Curious George?
A: 2 Fast ii Curious
62. Q: Did y'all hear about the hairdresser?
A: She dyed.
63. Q: What do you call a musician with problems?
A: a trebled homo.
64. Q: What is the best day to go to the embankment?
A: Sunday, of course!
65. Q: Which building is the largest?
A: The library, because it has the nigh stories.
66. Q: What do you call an illegally parked frog?
A: Toad.
67. Q: What exercise you lot phone call a very religious person that slumber walks?
A: A Roman Catholic
68. Q: Did you hear well-nigh the crab that went to the seafood disco?
A: He pulled a muscle
69. Q: Did you hear about the carrot detective?
A: He got to the root of every case.
seventy. Q: Why don't skeletons fight each other?
A: They don't have the guts.
71. Q: What practise you call cheese that is non yours?
A: Nacho Cheese
72. Q: What streets do ghosts haunt?
A: Dead ends!
73. Q: What's easy to go into but hard to get out of?
A: Trouble
74. Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Considering the chicken joke wasn't invented however.
75. Q: What kind of lights did Noah apply on the Ark?
A: Overflowing lights!
76. Q: Why did Goofy put a clock under his desk?
A: Considering he wanted to piece of work over-time!
77. Q: Exercise you know why diarrhea is hereditary?
A: Because it runs through your jeans. What would you exercise if I stole a osculation? Telephone call the Law
78. Q: What exercise you call a South American girl who is always in a hurry?
A: Urgent Tina
79. Q: Why practise birds fly s for the winter?
A: Its easier than walking!
lxxx. Q: What kind of central opens a banana?
A: A monkey!
Clean Jokes For Adults
81. Q: Did you hear nigh the vampire bicycle that went circular bitter people's arms off?
A: Information technology was a vicious bike.
82. Q: What do you call leftover aliens?
A: Actress Terrestrials.
83. Q: What's taken earlier you get it?
A: Your picture.
84. Q: Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: Yous tin roast beefiness, just you cant pea soup!
85. Q: What happens if yous eat yeast and shoe polish?
A: Every morn you lot'll rise and smooth!
86. Q: "What's the difference betwixt a guitar and a fish?"
A: "You can't tuna fish."
87. Q: What do you telephone call a infant monkey?
A: A Chimp off the one-time cake.
88. Q: What did the femur say to the patella?
A: I kneed you.
89. Q: Why did the picture go to jail?
A: Considering information technology was framed.
90. Q: What practise you call a three-footed aardvark?
A: A yardvark!
91. Q: What's the first bet that virtually people make in their lives?
A: The alpha bet
92. Q. What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and quackers!
93. Q: How practise you organize a infinite party?
A: You planet!
94. Q: Why do fish live in common salt water?
A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!
95. Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A: He wanted common cold hard cash!
96. Q: What do y'all get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.
97. Q: What has i head, i foot and four legs?
A: A Bed
98. Q: What is the difference between a school teacher and a train?
A: The teacher says spit your mucilage out and the train says "chew chew chew".
99. Q: Why did the birdie get to the hospital?
A: To get a tweetment.
100. Q: What did Delaware?
A: A New Bailiwick of jersey
101. Q: Why did Tony go out with a prune?
A: Considering he couldn't discover a date!
102. Q: What did the trivial mountain say to the large mountain?
A: Hi Cliff!
103. Q: What do you call an 80s synth popular band with a scoop of ice foam?
A: Depeche a la Manner.
104. Q: Why exercise ocean-gulls fly over the ocean?
A: Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!
105. Q: What dog keeps the best fourth dimension?
A: A watch dog.
106. Q: What did the penny say to the other penny?
A: We brand perfect cents.
107. Q: Why did the man with 1 hand cross the road?
A: To go to the second hand store.
108. Q: Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep?
A: Then he could accept sweet dreams.
109. Q: What happens if life gives you melons?
A: Your dyslexic
110. Q: What did one raindrop say to the other?
A: My plop is bigger than your plop.
111. Q: Why did the balloon flare-up
A: Considering is saw a lolly pop
112. Q: Which is the longest word in the lexicon?
A: "Smiles", because there is a mile between each "southward"!
113. Q: What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and wooden engine?
A: Information technology wooden go!
114. Q: Which calendar month do soldiers hate most?
A: The month of March!
115. Q: Whens the all-time time to go to the dentist?
A: Tooth-hurty
116. Q: What did one aspiring wig say to the other aspiring wig?
A: I wanna go a head!
117. Q: Did y'all hear nearly the paddle auction at the gunkhole store?
A: It was quite an oar deal.
118. Q: What practice you call a guy who never farts in public?
A: A private tutor.
119. Q: What do you call a bear with no socks on?
A: Bare-pes.
120. Q: What tin can you serve just never swallow?
A: A volleyball.
Funny Make clean Brusk Jokes
121. Q: Why tin can't a leopard hide?
A: Because he'southward always spotted!
122. Q: What do you give a canis familiaris with a fever?
A: Mustard, its the all-time matter for a hot domestic dog!
123. Q: What do you get when you cross a cat with a lemon?
A: A sour puss!
124. Q: What runs but can't walk?
A: The faucet!
125. Q: What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in?
A: A water bed!
126. Q: What kind of crackers do firemen like in their soup?
A: Firecrackers!
127. Q: Did you hear about the two bed bugs who met in the mattress?
A: They got married in the spring.
128. Q: Why practise watermelons have fancy weddings?
A: Because they cantaloupe.
129. Q: Have you heard the joke well-nigh the butter?
A: I better not tell you, it might spread.
130. Q: What did the judge say to the dentist?
A: Do you swear to pull the molar, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.
131. Q: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
A: He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!
132. Q: What goes upwards when the rain comes down?
A: An umbrella.
133. Q: What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
A: Ouch
134. Q: Why was the guy looking for fast nutrient ON his friend?
A: Because his friend said dinner is ON me.
135. Q: Did you lot hear the joke about the roof?
A: Never mind, information technology'south over your head!
136. Q: What did the leopard say after eating his owner?
A: Man, that hit the "spot."
137. Q: What do you telephone call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer!
138. Q: What do yous call security guards working outside Samsung shops?
A: Guardians of the Galaxy.
139. Q: What practice you call a bee that lives in America?
A: USB
140. Q: How practise you brand a tissue trip the light fantastic?
A: Put a bogey in it.
141. Q: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A: Considering he had no-body to go with.
142. Q: How practice crazy people go through the wood?
A: They take the psycho path.
143. Q: What does the Lone Ranger say when he takes out the garbage?
A: To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump.
144. Q: How many books can yous put in an empty backpack?
A: One! After that its not empty!
145. Q: What kind of push button won't unbutton?
A: A bellybutton!
146. Q: Why does a milking stool have simply three legs?
A: Because the cow has the utter.
147. Q: Did you hear about the monster with five legs?
A: His trousers fit him like a glove.
148. Q: Why don't you lot see giraffes in uncomplicated school?
A: Because they're all in Loftier Schoolhouse!
149. Q: How practise baseball game players stay cool?
A: They sit adjacent to their fans.
150. Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: Considering it had too many problems.
Clean I Liner Jokes
151. A bartender is just a chemist with a limited inventory.
152. For every action, at that place is an equal and contrary regime program.
153. If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
154. Final Affliction – Getting ill at the airport.
155. Ever try to be small and be proud of it!
156. Annihilation worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.
157. Artificial Intelligence commonly beats real stupidity.
158. Assassins do it from behind.
159. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
160. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
161. A closed mouth gathers no human foot.
162. Be dainty to your kids. They'll choose your nursing dwelling.
163. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
164. Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
165. Don't give up. Moses was in one case a basket case!
166. Parallel lines have then much in common. Information technology'southward a shame they'll never meet.
Funny Make clean Jokes for Kids
167. Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay. You have my Word.
168. My wife accused me of being young. I told her to leave of my fort.
169. We have a genetic predisposition for diarrhea. Runs in our jeans.
170. Plainly, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy.
171. I tried to catch fog yesterday, Mist.
172. Why did the scarecrow get a raise? He was outstanding in his field.
173. What do you call a adult female on the arm of a banjo player? A tattoo.
174. I chosen a psychic once. She asked who was on the line, then I hung up.
175. I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him run faster. If annihilation, it made him more than sluggish.
Clean Blonde Jokes
176. What do you call an eternity? Four blondes at a four style end.
177. What did the blonde practise when she missed the 44 bus? She took the 22 bus twice instead.
178. What practise smart blondes and UFOs have in mutual? You always hear nigh them but you never see them.
179. Why practise blondes always smile during lightning storms? They retrieve their picture show is being taken.
180. Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks? Information technology takes too long to re-train them.
181. Why exercise Blondes accept TGIF written on their shoes? To remind themselves that toes get in first.
182. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman equally opposed to a regular 1? You have to hollow out the caput.
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